Day 3: Something I have to forgive myself for

Let's see... there are many things I could name here, but I think I'm going to go with how irresponsible I was in my early 20's. I was quite a mess. Terrible with money, especially. If I saw something, I would buy it, regardless of whether or not I had money in my bank account. That's what credit cards were for, right? And... what happens when you sign up for too many and can't pay everyone's minimum payment? Yeah... not good. Not good at all.

I spent years, and I mean YEARS in financial Purgatory trying to catch up and just not go there anymore, sister. So, yes. There is definitely a method to my madness these days, because I could VERY easily slip back into spending beyond my means. But do I? No. I do not. I figuratively slap that overspending crazy girl in the face and I don't let her spend!

This is a good thing... and also a bad thing. Because nowadays, when I see something I want, I really, really, really have to think about it.

For days.

For weeks.

Sometimes years.

If I still want it, and feel like I can't live without it, I think about it some more, and then the guilt creeps in, and... there are times when I just... I just... can't bring myself to do it at all. And other times, I will. But believe me when I say this is VERY rare.

But hey, my credit score is pretty damn good now.

I have shoes that are 6 and 7 years old. I do shell out for those on occasion, because I like it when they last that long. But In 7 years... I have purchased less than 10 pairs of shoes for myself. That's right. I own less than 10 pairs of shoes.

It's true.

I try to make some articles of clothing last that long as well. I was really saddened to discover a favourite, 5 year old pair of jeans just... bit it last spring.

I still haven't replaced them.

There is safety in window shopping, and I can just look these days, because I just... think about how bad I was back then, and it stops me cold.

Really, it's fine. Sort of.

Hm. Perhaps it is time to just forgive myself, and use common sense when shopping. OK. I'll try.

-H